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Jul. 6th, 2007 12:55 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
canonical_insanity1. Shinji Mimura
2. Mitsuru Numai
3. Ianto Jones
4. David Lister
5. Theodore (Ted) Logan
6. Hirono Shimizu
7. Haruka Tanizawa
8. Jack Harkness
9. Izumi Kanai
10. Shiori Kitano
11. Ryo Kurosawa
12. Keita Iijima
13. Andrew Wells
14. Kazuo Kiriyama
15. Yumiko Kusaka
1) Okay, 12 and 7 get married and move in together. What kind of home would they live in? Who will decorate the house and would either of them be tempted to have an affair with 1?
Keita and Haruka get married...well, okay, movie!verse Keita is slightly more likely to get married to a girl than the other versions. They would have a decent sized house. Keita would do all of the cooking and hide the food whenever Haruka brought Yuko around to visit. Haruka's room would be full of her volleyball and cheerleading awards. Keita would have a few books, his lucky basketball -signed by the rest of the team- and whatever he was trying to learn that week. Would either of them be tempted to have an affair with Shinji? ...Yes. They both are in a fivesome with Shinji, Yutaka and Hirono (because that's canon at this point). Is it still an affair if they both know about it?
2) 1, 4, 8 & 13 fall through a dimensional portal leading to the Star Wars universe. What will they do until they gets back home? Also, will they work as a team or will they try to kill each other?
Shinji, David, Jack and Andrew fall into a portal. Jack would be flirting with the other three people mercilessly. They don't mind -except Lister, who admits that while Jack is much better looking than Rimmer, he's still not interested. Andrew, realising that his wildest dreams have come true, goes off to get a (14-inch) lightsaber, leaving Shinji and Jack alone. They have sex and then they steal the Millennium Falcon.
3) If 2 and 7 went out to dinner, where would they go, what would they eat, and what would they do afterwards?
Mitsuru/Haruka?! I write crack pairings, but not even I'm crazy enough to go near that one with a fourteen-inch pole.
4) What kind of a pet would 9 have?
Izumiapart from Mitsuru has a kitten.
5) How might 6 manage to badly offend 2, and what would 2 do about it?
Hirono could offend Mitsuru by breathing loudly. Or she could beat him in a fight. Or, because it's Hirono and she's special, she could flirt with Izumi. That would annoy him, a little. Or, due to the fact that it's BR, she could simply shoot him. That always works. :D Mitsuru would either shoot her back, or walk off, pretending that she hasn't just bruised his ego.
6) Due to some plot device, 8 & 11 end up in charge of a baby they're supposed to be jointly responsible for. How do they manage?
Well, both Jack and Ryo would make okay parents. Ianto and Naoki would be called in to help a lot (Kenji and Gwen came in once or twice too, but Jack wouldn't let Owen anywhere near the baby and Ryo wasn't happy with the way Jun was playing with the kid. Tetsuya and Toshiko took one look at the baby and decided to go on a 'night out' together almost constantly for the next decade and a half). The baby would turn out okay, except for a irrational hatred for terrorists, school teachers and pepper-pots. :D
7) It's up to 13 & 15 to save the universe! How doomed are we?
Andrew and Yumiko? ...Oh dear God no. We're completely screwed.
8) 1 asks for 3's hand in marriage. How does 3 react? And what possessed 1, anyway?
Shinji asks for Ianto's hand in marriage. Ianto takes one look at him and runs back to Cardiff -with Yutaka in tow :D- Shinji was either referring to Ianto's hacking skills, drunk or joking.
9) 3, 5, and 10 have gotten into a hair-pulling (where hair applies) knock-down drag-out fight ... for the silliest reason imaginable. Who are they, and what was the reason for the fight?
Ianto, Ted and Shiori got into a hair-pulling fight. Well, Ianto clearly wins because he has less hair. Ianto thought that Ted was an American version of the Doctor and got into a fight with him for stealing Jack. Shiori got blind drunk -due to getting into a drinking contest with Ryo and Masami (maybe it's better if you don't ask why :D)- and thought that Ted was a pre-dye Nanahara.
10a) What kind of nut is #7?
Haruka? An almond. Interesting shape, used in cooking and tasting slightly of cyanide. :D *shot*
10b) What kind of cheese is #3?
Ianto? He's kind of the mozzerella that binds Torchwood together. And I fully realise that I've spelt it wrong, yes.
10c) What kind of herb is #12?
Keita? Oregano. Slightly peppery, but still safe.
10d) What shape of pasta is #9?
Izumi? Fusilli. She's a little twisted, but not as much as Mitsuru would like.
10e) Would #15 have ANY IDEA why all of the four above things are related, and if so, could he or she make it? Would it be edible?
Yumiko doesn't cook. That's Yukiko's job.
11) 2, 10, 12 and 15 are in a car* together. Who drives, who is in the passenger seat and where are they going? (*or similar small vehicle)
Mitsuru, Keita, Shiori and Yumiko? Oh dear God. Okay, Keita's driving -although everyone wishes that he wasn'tagain. Shiori's in the passenger seat, having convinced Mitsuru to sit next to Mitsuru. Since ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
versipellis likes Mitsuru/Yumiko, they can make out on the way. Where are they going? Well, the three Shiroiwa people were going to meet up with Shuuya and Shinji's group, post BR. Shiori wants to avenge her dad, so she convinced them to give her a lift.
12) 1 and 5 are getting into politics together. How might they achieve their goals through a democratic forum?
Shinji and Ted? *winces* Because Ted's remotely cleverer than most other politicians and is mostly harmless, everyone votes for them. Shinji rules the world within a few months.
13) 3, 7, 8 and 11 are stranded on a hospitable but uninhabited planet. What is their situation a year later?
Ianto, Haruka, Jack and Ryo? Well, they're all alive. Ryo took off a couple of months ago and lives in a cave -after killing the bear that was originally living there. Haruka similarly took off and -after accidentally burning down a few forests- has managed to make a nice looking tree house on a tropical island. Ianto and Jack continued their relationship and are currently exploring the planet, while Jack is secretly trying to contact the Doctor to pick them up.
14) 4 challenges 14 to a duel. What happens, and why did they challenge?
David Lister and Kazuo Kiriyama? David cheats and lands Red Dwarf on top of Kazuo. It happened because Kazuo spilt his last curry as an experiment.
15) 3&4 and 7&9 team up to compete against each other. What would the game (sport? challenge?) be, which team would win, and why?
Ianto and Lister versus Haruka and Izumi? Well, it started as a cooking contest. Ianto would have taken it, but Lister put too many chilies in the sauce and the judges ran away with burning throats, giving it to the girls by default.
16) It's 2008. 1 has decided to run for president, with 3 as his/her running mate. Opposing him/her is 13, with 6 as his/her running mate. Who wins, and why - and what happens after they take power?
Shinji and Ianto versus Andrew and Hirono. *winces* They all cheat outrageously. Eventually Ianto sets his Cyberwoman girlfriend on Andrew and Hirono. Andrew summons a demon to rip her to shreds. The demon goes too far and rips Ianto to shreds too. Shinji and Hirono have a shooting match. Shinji kills Hirono accidentally, but not before she shoots him in several places. Since all of this has been taped -and only Hirono knew where the camera was- a third party, headed by Shuuya and Yutaka, eventually wins.
17) 1, 4, 7, 12, 15 are playing poker. Who cheats, who wins, and who is a sore loser? What other antics ensue?
Shinji, Lister, Haruka, Keita and Yumiko are playing. Keita and Yumiko are terrible bluffers, so lose. Lister tries to cheat, but is caught and goes off for a drink. Haruka is a very sore loser and storms off in a huff, after Shinji wins. Shinji and Keita wanted to play strip poker, but Yumiko and Haruka wouldn't.
18) 5, 9, 10 get somehow stuck in a subway train. What happens?
Shiori, Izumi and Ted. Ted phones Bill and asks him to pick them up in his mock-Tardis. He tries to convince the two girls to come with him, but neither of them speak English. Eventually Shiori gets what he was trying to say and translates. The three -with Bill- then crash into the real Tardis and -because they aren't Jack- they die.
19) 5 or 7 are going to become the next prez. You get to choice. Who and Why?
Ted or Haruka? ...Probably Haruka. She's slightly smarter.
20) Finally of all fifteen...who would you pick to babysit?
Ianto. Definitely Ianto.
2. Mitsuru Numai
3. Ianto Jones
4. David Lister
5. Theodore (Ted) Logan
6. Hirono Shimizu
7. Haruka Tanizawa
8. Jack Harkness
9. Izumi Kanai
10. Shiori Kitano
11. Ryo Kurosawa
12. Keita Iijima
13. Andrew Wells
14. Kazuo Kiriyama
15. Yumiko Kusaka
1) Okay, 12 and 7 get married and move in together. What kind of home would they live in? Who will decorate the house and would either of them be tempted to have an affair with 1?
Keita and Haruka get married...well, okay, movie!verse Keita is slightly more likely to get married to a girl than the other versions. They would have a decent sized house. Keita would do all of the cooking and hide the food whenever Haruka brought Yuko around to visit. Haruka's room would be full of her volleyball and cheerleading awards. Keita would have a few books, his lucky basketball -signed by the rest of the team- and whatever he was trying to learn that week. Would either of them be tempted to have an affair with Shinji? ...Yes. They both are in a fivesome with Shinji, Yutaka and Hirono (because that's canon at this point). Is it still an affair if they both know about it?
2) 1, 4, 8 & 13 fall through a dimensional portal leading to the Star Wars universe. What will they do until they gets back home? Also, will they work as a team or will they try to kill each other?
Shinji, David, Jack and Andrew fall into a portal. Jack would be flirting with the other three people mercilessly. They don't mind -except Lister, who admits that while Jack is much better looking than Rimmer, he's still not interested. Andrew, realising that his wildest dreams have come true, goes off to get a (14-inch) lightsaber, leaving Shinji and Jack alone. They have sex and then they steal the Millennium Falcon.
3) If 2 and 7 went out to dinner, where would they go, what would they eat, and what would they do afterwards?
Mitsuru/Haruka?! I write crack pairings, but not even I'm crazy enough to go near that one with a fourteen-inch pole.
4) What kind of a pet would 9 have?
Izumi
5) How might 6 manage to badly offend 2, and what would 2 do about it?
Hirono could offend Mitsuru by breathing loudly. Or she could beat him in a fight. Or, because it's Hirono and she's special, she could flirt with Izumi. That would annoy him, a little. Or, due to the fact that it's BR, she could simply shoot him. That always works. :D Mitsuru would either shoot her back, or walk off, pretending that she hasn't just bruised his ego.
6) Due to some plot device, 8 & 11 end up in charge of a baby they're supposed to be jointly responsible for. How do they manage?
Well, both Jack and Ryo would make okay parents. Ianto and Naoki would be called in to help a lot (Kenji and Gwen came in once or twice too, but Jack wouldn't let Owen anywhere near the baby and Ryo wasn't happy with the way Jun was playing with the kid. Tetsuya and Toshiko took one look at the baby and decided to go on a 'night out' together almost constantly for the next decade and a half). The baby would turn out okay, except for a irrational hatred for terrorists, school teachers and pepper-pots. :D
7) It's up to 13 & 15 to save the universe! How doomed are we?
Andrew and Yumiko? ...Oh dear God no. We're completely screwed.
8) 1 asks for 3's hand in marriage. How does 3 react? And what possessed 1, anyway?
Shinji asks for Ianto's hand in marriage. Ianto takes one look at him and runs back to Cardiff -with Yutaka in tow :D- Shinji was either referring to Ianto's hacking skills, drunk or joking.
9) 3, 5, and 10 have gotten into a hair-pulling (where hair applies) knock-down drag-out fight ... for the silliest reason imaginable. Who are they, and what was the reason for the fight?
Ianto, Ted and Shiori got into a hair-pulling fight. Well, Ianto clearly wins because he has less hair. Ianto thought that Ted was an American version of the Doctor and got into a fight with him for stealing Jack. Shiori got blind drunk -due to getting into a drinking contest with Ryo and Masami (maybe it's better if you don't ask why :D)- and thought that Ted was a pre-dye Nanahara.
10a) What kind of nut is #7?
Haruka? An almond. Interesting shape, used in cooking and tasting slightly of cyanide. :D *shot*
10b) What kind of cheese is #3?
Ianto? He's kind of the mozzerella that binds Torchwood together. And I fully realise that I've spelt it wrong, yes.
10c) What kind of herb is #12?
Keita? Oregano. Slightly peppery, but still safe.
10d) What shape of pasta is #9?
Izumi? Fusilli. She's a little twisted, but not as much as Mitsuru would like.
10e) Would #15 have ANY IDEA why all of the four above things are related, and if so, could he or she make it? Would it be edible?
Yumiko doesn't cook. That's Yukiko's job.
11) 2, 10, 12 and 15 are in a car* together. Who drives, who is in the passenger seat and where are they going? (*or similar small vehicle)
Mitsuru, Keita, Shiori and Yumiko? Oh dear God. Okay, Keita's driving -although everyone wishes that he wasn't
versipellis likes Mitsuru/Yumiko, they can make out on the way. Where are they going? Well, the three Shiroiwa people were going to meet up with Shuuya and Shinji's group, post BR. Shiori wants to avenge her dad, so she convinced them to give her a lift.12) 1 and 5 are getting into politics together. How might they achieve their goals through a democratic forum?
Shinji and Ted? *winces* Because Ted's remotely cleverer than most other politicians and is mostly harmless, everyone votes for them. Shinji rules the world within a few months.
13) 3, 7, 8 and 11 are stranded on a hospitable but uninhabited planet. What is their situation a year later?
Ianto, Haruka, Jack and Ryo? Well, they're all alive. Ryo took off a couple of months ago and lives in a cave -after killing the bear that was originally living there. Haruka similarly took off and -after accidentally burning down a few forests- has managed to make a nice looking tree house on a tropical island. Ianto and Jack continued their relationship and are currently exploring the planet, while Jack is secretly trying to contact the Doctor to pick them up.
14) 4 challenges 14 to a duel. What happens, and why did they challenge?
David Lister and Kazuo Kiriyama? David cheats and lands Red Dwarf on top of Kazuo. It happened because Kazuo spilt his last curry as an experiment.
15) 3&4 and 7&9 team up to compete against each other. What would the game (sport? challenge?) be, which team would win, and why?
Ianto and Lister versus Haruka and Izumi? Well, it started as a cooking contest. Ianto would have taken it, but Lister put too many chilies in the sauce and the judges ran away with burning throats, giving it to the girls by default.
16) It's 2008. 1 has decided to run for president, with 3 as his/her running mate. Opposing him/her is 13, with 6 as his/her running mate. Who wins, and why - and what happens after they take power?
Shinji and Ianto versus Andrew and Hirono. *winces* They all cheat outrageously. Eventually Ianto sets his Cyberwoman girlfriend on Andrew and Hirono. Andrew summons a demon to rip her to shreds. The demon goes too far and rips Ianto to shreds too. Shinji and Hirono have a shooting match. Shinji kills Hirono accidentally, but not before she shoots him in several places. Since all of this has been taped -and only Hirono knew where the camera was- a third party, headed by Shuuya and Yutaka, eventually wins.
17) 1, 4, 7, 12, 15 are playing poker. Who cheats, who wins, and who is a sore loser? What other antics ensue?
Shinji, Lister, Haruka, Keita and Yumiko are playing. Keita and Yumiko are terrible bluffers, so lose. Lister tries to cheat, but is caught and goes off for a drink. Haruka is a very sore loser and storms off in a huff, after Shinji wins. Shinji and Keita wanted to play strip poker, but Yumiko and Haruka wouldn't.
18) 5, 9, 10 get somehow stuck in a subway train. What happens?
Shiori, Izumi and Ted. Ted phones Bill and asks him to pick them up in his mock-Tardis. He tries to convince the two girls to come with him, but neither of them speak English. Eventually Shiori gets what he was trying to say and translates. The three -with Bill- then crash into the real Tardis and -because they aren't Jack- they die.
19) 5 or 7 are going to become the next prez. You get to choice. Who and Why?
Ted or Haruka? ...Probably Haruka. She's slightly smarter.
20) Finally of all fifteen...who would you pick to babysit?
Ianto. Definitely Ianto.
